


For The Salvation of Us

by WatercolorSunrise



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Another Story (Mystic Messenger), Dissociative Identity Disorder, Drug Use, F/M, Mint Eye, Multiple Personalities, Worried MC
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-02 05:27:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18804640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WatercolorSunrise/pseuds/WatercolorSunrise
Summary: The voice in his head nags to be heard. A small, repeating “let me out” chanted over and over again. Ray claps his hands over his ears, shaking his head. But voices from within cannot be blocked out so easily. What is he supposed to do when the very thing threatening her, is a part of himself?Ray fights with his darker side - the other him - for power over the body they both occupy.





	For The Salvation of Us

His fingers clack at the keyboard relentlessly. Fighting off yet another counterattack of the red-head. How long can the other hacker really keep this up? Stupid question, he knows exactly how long. He slams the enter key, running his most recent code and waits impatiently staring at the screens in front of him. At least it gives him a moment to breathe. When was the last time he slept anyway? Or ate? None of that matters anyway. The only thing that matters is doing his job correctly and maybe, just maybe, if he does a really good job he can allow himself to see her.

Her - just the thought of her brings heat to his face. His otherwise pale, peaked face. She kissed him. She. Kissed. Him. Last night in the garden, he had been rambling stupid meaningless thoughts and she just stepped in and pressed her perfect lips to his very imperfect ones. That… was good? Right? It should have been, but he ran… stupid. Something that felt that good couldn't be bad, right? Ah but he's been wrong before. No. No she told him herself “Ray I like you, a lot” that doesn't make any sense though, how could someone like her be interested in him? Could she be lying?  
  
“ _She’s lying, and you know it, you’re pathetic.”_ a faded, yet intense voice speaks to him from his own mind.

“Shut up!” he shouts at the voice in his head, while recalling again that precious moment.

No, no he can't think about that now he has far too much work to do and not enough time to do it. He stifles a yawn and ignores his heavy eyelids, pulling the drawer under his keyboard open and searching for the caffeine pills that are more convenient than sleep these days. Stretching his hands to the back of the drawer, his slender fingers finally close around a small cylinder shape. He pops open the top and dumps a few pills into his palm, throwing his head back, taking the pills and swallowing - no water. No, he doesn't deserve water, not now. Not until he can say he’s done his job to the best of his meager abilities. He reels back from his intake of pills, attention snapping to the error code displayed blatantly on the screen. He groans in frustration and jolts his hands over the keyboard once more, knocking over the bottle of caffeine pills in the process and scattering them all over that hard tile floor. Frustration builds further, but he elects to ignore it for now, the pills can be cleaned up later. He has work to do, he has to figure out where the error is. He has to do better, he is better, right?

\--

_Bang! Bang! Bang!_

The next thing he knows a sharp knocking at the door to his room is jarring him out of his nap. Nap? He’s not supposed to nap!

 _Stupid, stupid Ray. There’s no time for napping, there’s no time for anything, you’re so useless you can't even stay awake long enough to do your damn job. You’ll never get to see her now. You don't deserve to see her anyway. Why would she want to see someone as pathetic as you?_ He chides himself, making his way over to the door to open it to whichever believer the Savior has sent to check up on him this time.

He opens the door and standing before him is his savior and two other believers. She’s so beautiful, so delicate looking yet so powerful. She saved him, it’s all thanks to her that he’s even alive, and that he holds such a high position in this place. He’s come so far since…

“Ray?” Uh-oh, her tone is low, scolding. He knows just from this that she isn't happy, of course she isn't happy. That traitor got through security. Security he wasn't watching because he was being reckless. _Stupid, stupid Ray_ the mantra repeats in his head once again.

She continues, scowl already creating her otherwise perfect features. “You weren't sleeping, were you?”  
  
“Savior!” He says a little too panicked “Uh-I”

“Save it, I can see the indents of your sleeves all over you face, how long have you been slacking exactly?”  
  
His heart falls to the pit of his stomach, did he really think he was going to be able lie to her? _Stupid,Useless_

“I’ve tried to go easy on you Ray, you know that. You know I don’t want to hurt you.” His savior says in her honey dipped voice.

“Of course my savior, I'm sorry. I’ll do better! I can do better!” Ray pleads nervously.    
  
“Oh, I’m going to personally see to it that you do. I know you haven't been taking the elixir I’ve been sending to you. Do you think you know better than I do?” She holds a hand out to one of the believers standing next to her as they produce a bottle of liquid all too familiar to him.  
  
“No Savior! I know nothing of what's best for me, please give me another chance I-”  
  
“Hold him down” She commands the believers on either side of her. They comply immediately, each taking one of his too thin arms in their hands and bringing him to his knees.

“Open your mouth” She commands of him lifting the larger-than-average-bottle of the offensive elixir.    
  
“Savior please not now, I need to work I need too-”  
  
She laughs bitterly “Oh is that what you were doing then?! I don’t think so.”

She forces his mouth open and pours the bitter, blue-green liquid down his throat.  
  
“I’m sorry Ray, you just aren't strong enough” He hears her say as he gags and chokes on the volatile liquid. “ _He_ won’t get so easily distracted, I’m sure” Ray hears her say as he slowly begins to fade, something darker lurking just below the surface.

\--

Somewhere else in that same building a young woman paces nervously in her borrowed, but poshly decorated room. Holding her phone tightly between her hands she worries herself with thoughts of what could have happened to the sweet boy who's more than caught her attention in the few days she’s been at this strange place.

She touches her own lips again, stomach leaping at the mixed feelings surrounding the moment she impulsively pressed her lips against his in a desperate attempt to get him to stop degrading himself, to even give him a glimpse of the way she sees him.

That was last night, they haven't talked as much today as she would like, he's been extremely busy today, even more so than usual. In fact all signs of him seem to have disappeared. She wonders idly how this place would even manage to exist if it wasn't for all him. Maybe it wouldn't and maybe that would be better.

-

A short while later, someone knocks on her door. Positive it must be Ray she opens the door right away, eager to see him and calm her worries. Her fears are irrational, right? But it is not Ray at the door instead it is a believer from the lost and found inquiring about a bookmark they found. Asking after its owner and revealing it to her. It looks familiar. After closer inspection she’s sure it belongs to Ray, or belonged to Ray? The handwriting is that of a child’s but his personality is all over the thing. She claims it to be hers and them timidly asks after Ray.

“You haven't heard? Mr. Ray is undergoing his cleansing at the moment.”

Her eyes grow wide at the news, but the believer doesn’t seem to think of this as anything but ordinary. Not wanting to cause alarm she dismisses him and shuts the door. “Oh Ray, what’s happening to you?

\--

Back in his room, the Savior has seen to it that Ray has consumed his elixir and leaves him to wait out the effects on his own. Closing the door behind her she motions to the two believers at her side. “Make sure he gets back to work as fast as possible and pay no mind to the screaming.”

They nod their heads in compliance and take guard at either side of his heavy metal clad door.

Inside Ray shakes violently, clinging to himself, rocking himself back and forth. He’s too hot, he tears his jacket off, then his cravat and vest, finally his shirt comes off revealing every nasty scar and protruding rib. He paces across the small room. Once, twice, after a while he loses track completely how many times he's paced the few meters that make up his small room. Finally he stops, catching sight of himself in the small mirror on his dresser.

The voice in his head nags to be heard. A small, repeating “ _let me out_ ” chanted over and over again. Ray claps his hands over his ears turns away from the mirror, shaking his head. But voices from within cannot be blocked out so easily.

“ _Let. Me. Out_.” The voice in his head screams. An almost crazed tone accenting each word, different from Ray’s own voice.

“NO, you- you'll hurt her, you'll- I don't know what you'll do!” Ray says aloud to the other one, a battle he cannot win just beginning.

“ _If you don't let me out, we're going to die on this floor, we’ll never get our job done, and it'll be your fault! You're pathetic. I can't wait to get rid of you._ ”

“I-I can do this, I'll do it for her! I won't let you win, I won’t let you hurt her “

“ _Who? That stupid airhead you have locked up in that disgusting room?_ ”

“She’s not an airhead! She’s brilliant! And she's not locked up! She's not! She wants to be there, she - she likes me!”

“ _HA! You? Who the fuck would like you?! There's only one woman in this world who cares for us and it's the Savior, you'd do well to remember that, Marshmallow Boy._ ”

“No, no, no, she’s different”

In a desperate attempt to ground himself he grabs his phone off his bedside table and shakily dials her number.

\--

 

Suddenly, her phone comes to life, displaying the very name she’s been waiting to see. She picks up before the first ring can even complete.  
  
“Ray?!” she says frantically.  
  
“Is it really you? Please... Please don't hang up… please!”  
  
“Ray, what's going on?!”

“My head… it hurts, I feel like I’m going to explode… I …” His breathing is labored and heavy. She can feel her chest tighten at the sound of it.

“You should leave me alone, I'm too weak. Just let me stay in the corner” he continues. “I wish it would all go away, I think I have to go now. I'm too weak. I’m too scared. I should have never breathed in the first place. I must be gone for our salvation.”

 _Ours? As in mine and his? Or?_ She wonders in her head but can't speak.

“NO, no I want to stay. I want to see you… I want to stay with you” He says, as if arguing with himself out loud.

“Paradise… I’ll  do anything for our paradise, so please just let me stay in the corner. I’ll miss you, but I need to be gone, so that you will stay. You must be happy.”

She’s never heard him sound so resigned before, so defeated. The phone goes silent. Something wet falls from her face, and then another. She wants to help him but everyone in this place frightens her except him. She curls on the bed weeping, feeling just as defeated as him, and so helpless. This place is poison, she’s sure of it.

\--

He can feel the other one taking over. Two opposites fighting over control of a metaphorical car neither of them fully understand how to drive. Somewhere in the backseat a small boy calls for his brother, while a young man next to him starts to awaken.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! This is my first fanfic I've ever published so its a big step for me, leave a comment if you liked it!
> 
> I took a little creative liberty at the end there with the 4 different personalities. It's an idea I play with from time to time that Saeran has more than just two personalities.


End file.
